Twenty Twenty Two
It was Spring. The last few clusters of snow were scattered on the brown, muddy lawns in my neighborhood, clinging onto whatever winter they had left. The sun was shining and I was standing in my driveway playing. I remember this day, in 2005, because it was the day that I learned that the years changed.
I stood in the driveway when my mom said something about it being 2005 and I remember being so confused. All I knew, all I understood, was 2004. I didn’t understand what a year actually was, that it was temporary, what its length was, that it increased, or what it meant to age. The year Two-Thousand and Four was as concrete to me as the driveway I had been painting chalk on.
It wasn’t meant to change.
I remember crying because for whatever reason I had an attachment to 2004 and I didn’t want to be in 2005. I wanted to stay in 2004 forever…
Change is hard.
And if you ask my parents, change has always been something that I have struggled with. It has only been in recent years that I’ve started to embrace change as a positive; as something to gain, rather than something I have lost or will lose.
So… as we all hopefully know by now, fourteen years later, the years still change.
In the past year, I have found comfort in finding meaning in things all around me- including numbers. Angel numbers are numbers that tend to appear in sequences or patterns (222,444, 1234…etc.) or maybe they are numbers that you happen to see often. Maybe you always check the time at 11:11. Or you see the number 555 on different license plates. Or maybe you make a wish every time the clock reads 12:30. These are all angel numbers, numbers that have meaning in some way to you personally or divinely.
2022… the number 22 means new opportunities, new beginnings and encourages you to seek discomfort. Which, I’d say, was true to my year.
LIFE in 2022
This year was anything short of magic. It was a whirlwind of lessons, change, emotions, and beauty.
This year I met a new version of myself.
I learned more about myself this year than I have in a long time. And funnily enough, it didn’t take losing someone or heartbreak to learn those lessons. It took gaining someone and opening my heart to the unknown.
This year, I met the part of myself that wanted to let love in, and that wasn’t afraid of the pain that may accompany doing so. This year, I met the part of myself that didn’t wear armor, but rather, was willing to let someone make me feel protected without taking away my independence. I met the parts of myself that I buried a long time ago because somewhere along the way, other people skewed my perception of what healthy love should be…
and I let her breathe again.
In letting these parts of me shine, I learned how to be someone’s partner and how to HAVE a partner without running away. I learned, and I am still learning, how to balance all the things that I love in my life- friends, family, art, writing, and my partner. This has been difficult and I still carry guilt and fear that I’m not able to balance it all. That I’m not present enough, that I’m missing out on the big things, that people feel forgotten or less important, or that I’m putting everyone else ahead of myself… I’m still learning how to be kinder to myself in those moments.
When I look back on Twenty Twenty Two, I will think about the early hours of the morning on New Year’s Day, laughing and falling in the kitchen with my beautiful best friends after too many glasses of wine. We sang Taylor Swift until the speaker died and trust fell into each other’s arms. A year later, I still trust them to catch me when I fall.
I will remember how supportive, excited and kind Jerrod-Ann and Annie were while I checked off a dream of mine from my bucket list (a blog about this is coming this year so stay tuned). How they have continued to be my #1 fans, and how their love feels like the greatest gift in the world.
I spent many nights laughing on the back deck, on warm evenings and sunny days with my roommates and upstairs neighbors. I cherish their smiles in my memories and the hours of cards and movie nights we have all had together.
FRIENDS in 2022
In the past year, I cheered on my best friends while they achieved their goals. I watched them become strong, intelligent, and kind humans who succeeded in their endeavors. All while laughing until our stomachs ached. Their friendships now span across the country and the world. Although we are miles apart I still love them all dearly.
I turned 24 this year!
I celebrated my birthday in Ottawa surrounded by my loving family and friends. I brought Jerrod-Ann and Annie to show them my home and to introduce them to the people that raised me. It was a day filled with delicious food, laughter, bonfires, and, of course, wine.
This year, I learned a lot about tolerance, integrity, and respect. I learned that not everything is as it seems and that I had matured since 2021. Going back to Camp White Pine opened my eyes to the type of work environment I truly desire and can tolerate. I learned the importance of respect and care and that even though the environment where you work won’t always necessarily be the best, it’s the people whom you surround yourself with that truly matter.
I had the absolute privilege of meeting some extraordinary people this summer.
I had the honor of sitting next to the biggest and brightest light one day at lunch- Sofi.
Sofi has the most contagious smile, the kindest heart, and the most compassionate outlook on life. She is a breath of fresh air and we bonded so quickly. We were literally giddy to see each other in the mornings and every time we could throughout the day. I will cherish our memories of going to my cottage, her teaching me about her culture and all the food she craved while she was far from home. I will never forget how we sat on the docks with Roselia watching the northern lights in complete awe and disbelief.
I also met Roselia, who was connected to me by an invisible string and whose path I was destined to cross.
Roselia (Rosie) makes me laugh! LAUGH! She always made my day better and we became best friends this summer. She put my work ethic to shame and never failed to challenge me to new experiences. She’s a piece of home and familiarity that I can always look to when I am out East, which I love.
I spent summer nights dancing my heart out with Jerrod-Ann. We competed in Dancing with the Staff. Jerrod-Ann and I would wake up at 6 am some days to choreograph dances and practice endlessly all week until our big performance. Our beautiful competitors also danced their hearts out and it made for some of the funniest nights at camp. Ultimately, Jerrod-Ann and I did become the CWP Dancing with the Staff Champions of 2022- walking away with the grand prize of a 25$ MacDonald’s gift card, last year’s CWP T-Shirts, and winter hats. But the real prize was the memories we made doing it.
Please feel free to watch our incredibly amateur dances below
Week 1
Week 2: Hip Hop
Week 3: Throwbacks
Week 4: The Finale
I want to thank every single person that made me smile this year and every single person I met at camp who made me laugh and that sparked a conversation with me.
You are all so beautiful and I wish you all the best.
This past year I traveled again! I went to New York City with my best friend, my partner in crime, and the person who understands my craziness- Emily.
Emily and I met at Camp White Pine in 2021, we bonded over our love for Noah Kahan, an underappreciated, (then) unknown indie-folk singer. This summer we reunited at camp and I literally couldn’t have gotten through this summer without her. She is my rock and my best friend and this year we not only survived camp, but we traveled to NYC to see the one and only Noah Kahan live in concert. Not only that, but we MET HIM. We actually sat next to the one person that we both completely adore and admire. I think I speak for myself and Emily when I say we are grateful for Noah Kahan because his music has healed us and has been our anthem for many years now. I’m grateful for Noah Kahan because his music in some ways brought me to Emily and our friendship has grown to become one for the history books.
LOVE in 2022
I’d have to say one of the biggest things to happen to me this year would be meeting Jason.
On a random night in March, my friends decided to go to the bar… that night I met one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. While waiting for the bartender to ask for water, I got to talking with this guy and we immediately hit it off, the conversations flowed, the laughs felt natural and he made me feel some things that I hadn’t felt in a long time- butterflies.
After that night, I wasn’t sure that I’d see Jason again, but I knew I wanted to. Luckily, the universe also thought it would be a good idea for us to find each other. Fast forward to April, spending nights on the phone with a guy I’d met a handful of times, laughing for hours, and feeling feelings I’d only ever read about or seen in movies.
It wasn’t long before I fell in love with Jason. Falling in love is a scary feeling and I have a lot of respect for people that are brave enough to take that leap. Falling in love is also really exciting. I never thought that I would find someone that compliments me so well, and that makes me feel supported, safe, loved, and cared for the way that Jason does. Jason makes me smile without having to try. He makes me laugh so hard that my stomach aches and I know we can always be goofy together. I want to thank him for his patience, his love, his loyalty, and his friendship. It has been a whirlwind, but in the past year, he has become my person.
This year I fell in love and it has been
the most amazing journey yet.
Thank you to all the people in my life that have supported me throughout this big change.
HOME in 2022
In Twenty-Twenty Two, I spent summer weekends at my cottage with my parents. I went back to Prince Edward Island with my whole family, including Jason, and we revisited the red sands that I spent almost every summer walking. We spent many nights gathered around the table, playing cards, and retelling old stories that still bring smiles to our faces. I was able to see my parents often and spend time at home with my dogs, in my home in Ottawa. I was grateful for every day I could come home and just be with my family.
I also met Jason’s family and his friends (which let’s face it, are his family too). I have never felt so welcomed by strangers. His family and friends have been so kind and they have made me feel included since day one. It has been a pleasure getting to know them and spending time with them.
It’s been an eventful year. There are so many more memories, if I kept writing this would become a novel. This past year, Twenty-Twenty-Two, was full of opportunities. It was full of new beginnings and I stepped outside of my comfort zone in one of the biggest ways I could have.
It will be hard to say goodbye to such a pivotal year, but I’m hoping it has laid a solid foundation for this new year.
Twenty Twenty Three…
The number 23, ironically, is symbolic of change, transformation, and progress. As someone who is still becoming friends with change, this year will have its challenges. Hopefully, those challenges will be accompanied by triumphs.
As I do every year, I have my goals for this new year.
Some are big… some are small…
all are exciting.
My Goals & Changes for 2023
Visit out West
Exercise and Eat Healthy
Drink more water
Check Two Things off of my Bucket List
Run 1/2 Marathon
Morals
Be more present
NICU intensive training
Move into an apartment with Jason
Make myself a priority and make time for the things I love
Seek discomfort
Budget and Save Money
Blog More * I am going to set the goal of posting every two months
Surf more/ spend more time outdoors
Try to complete Ski Patrol
Learn how to drive a manual car
Stretch more
Meet new people and embrace change
So there you have it, if you’ve managed to read this far, thank you for your dedication.
To anyone that crossed my path in 2022, thank you for coming into my life.
To my friends and family, I love you and support you, and know I am grateful for our memories from 2022.
Going into this New Year, take a moment and reflect on the year that has passed…
What parts of yourself did you meet this past year?
What memories made you smile in 2022?
What lessons did you learn this past year?
Who is someone you are happy you met this past year?
What is one thing you want to have done by next year? Big or small.
