2020
Ten years ago today, I started writing. I had gotten a gift card to Walmart from my grandmother for Christmas and I spent it on a journal. It was pink with a picture of bamboo on the front and Chinese letters sprawled across it, that I still don’t know the meaning of.
It was my first journal.
One of the first things I wrote was about what I wanted to be when I grew up. I think I was upset about something, but I wrote about how when I grew up I wanted to be famous and I wanted to be an actress and I “did NOT want to be a nurse”.
It is funny how so much can change in ten years. Although, I am still hopeful that one day I will win an Oscar or something.
Over the past decade I have filled eight journals with pages upon pages of stories and memories and feelings. I have my past ten years documented on paper, to look back on and reminisce about.
I have stories of my first slow dance or starting high school. I have tickets and postcards from the concerts I have been to and the countries I have visited. Writings of Christmases, Halloweens, graduations and parties sit between lines in inks of black, pink and green. I have photos and memories of my sweet sixteen and my closest friends.
I wrote about all of the times I had my heart broken or felt alone. I have entries of the best days and experiences of my life so far (October 8th 2015 & March 23rd 2019). I wrote about first crushes, kisses, exams, planes, friends, pets…
The point is, since twenty-ten, I grew up.
I went through more milestones in the past ten years than I could have ever imagined and I didn’t even realize that they were significant until now.
I learned a lot about myself and the type of person I want to become. I know now that I value laughter above anything else. And that honesty, acceptance, love and kindness can go a long way in your day to day life. More recently, I have realized that surrounding yourself with people that make you happy and that care about you is one of the greatest gifts that you can give yourself.
Even though I had pages upon pages of words and trinkets, it was the names that stood out to me the most. On almost every page, was the name of a person that impacted my life in some way. I read through years of names of friends, classmates, bullies, team mates, family members… all the people who changed me and shaped me in some way.
I dedicate this post to them.
To the people who made my life better- the friends and family that have come and gone along the way
To the people who told me I CANT- for showing me I CAN
To the people who broke my heart- for teaching me how to forgive or move forward
To the people who broke my spirit- for teaching me to rise up again and again and again
To the people who made all the difference- because even the little things can make the biggest difference and it never goes unnoticed.
With this decade coming to a close, I want you (whoever is reading this) to take a moment and think about some of the things you’ve achieved this past year and this past decade. Take a second and be proud of yourself. See the good that has happened and try to let it fill you with light and joy for the new year to come.
Now, I have mixed feelings about new year’s resolutions. It’s the time of year when for two weeks people migrate to gyms and eat, breathe, sleep fruits and vegetables. The diets start, the hair colours change, the “new” you fad takes off… Until February begins and you’re the same you that you have always been.
(click right to see 2019’s To Do List)
My new year’s resolutions are my goals for the year; the boxes I want to check off before the clock strikes midnight on December 31st. Some years my resolutions are to be more positive or laugh more often. Sometimes they are more direct like- “get into university” or “stay in university. “
Since the new year has begun, the following are …
My 2020 New Year’s Resolutions:
Learn how to drive a manual car
Learn sign language
Buy oil/acrylic paints and learn how to use them
Let go of grudges
No more drama
Read one book at least every month
Stop spending money on materialistic things
Work out west this summer
Get an 80% average
Put in an effort/ have a better work ethic
Eat better and be active
Swim 50m freestyle in 30 seconds or less
Get my boating licence
Run a 10km or half marathon
Do OCrew again
Get another piercing
Make more genuine connections with people
Start meditating
Get my X RING
Start a youtube channel (this one might take a while)
Twenty-nineteen was a year full of fresh starts, opportunities, new friendships and crazy adventures. There were new challenges and obstacles that I thought I would never have had to face, but that I have grown from as well as the realization that nothing is permanent.
Another decade means another ten years of milestones and memories. I hope that by twenty-thirty some things will seem more clear, that I will have a better understanding of myself and people in general, that our planet will start to heal and that my Oscar will be sitting on my mantel (just kidding… kinda).
Cheers to a New Year, not a fresh start, but the opportunity for change and improvement.
It was the end of a decade, but the start of an age.
